nearlychosen | 1st seed; [Action/Voice]

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1st seed; [Action/Voice]

[Perhaps the journal picks up the sound of Neville's arrival as he is unceremoniously deposited on the icy southern lake sometime in the dead of night. If not that, then it might catch the dull groaning as he slowly wakes and struggles to pull himself upright. If not that, then certainly the furious squeak from sneakers lacking traction on slippery ice would catch the journal's attention, as would the dull thudding as Neville collides with some child's forgotten snowman on the westernmost bank. A sharp intake of breath, then] No wand. Bastards. [In fact, even though Neville hasn't yet noticed the presence of the book at all, he seems perfectly aware that someone is listening, even if it isn't quite who he expects.]

It's still not enough! [The words, though a bit rasped and wheezing, are spoken with the stubbornness of one who rather expected this displacement.] You think you can just Portkey me someplace and be done with it? You won't get me -- not any of us -- to back down that easily. I know you're here -- show yourselves, you bloody cowards!

[The dead silence is less than encouraging. It means that if he wasn't being watched, then he'd been sent far enough that he wouldn't need supervision. Accio wand. [The incantation is intoned softly through clenched teeth. It doesn't escape him how ironic it was that in his desperation to recover his stolen wand he's resorted to a summoning spell that usually required the use of his wand in the first place. The spell fails spectacularly, leaving Neville to suppose his captors laughed, wherever they happen to be.

Still, the place he'd been sent certainly merits some investigation. If he'd been sent here via portkey, then some other innocuous-looking thing might well be the ticket home. It might appear off for a young, underdressed, blackeyed, fairly beaten and emaciated man to be picking up small stones with a thoughtful expression, but finding an alternate portkey is simply the most plausible way back to the more important matters he'd left at home.]

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[Harry looks at Draco like he's retarded.] Why the hell do you think I'm asking you about it, then? I haven't been at Hogwarts, so why would I have any idea what was happening there? If I was just going to take Neville's side of it because he's a Gryffindor, we wouldn't be having this conversation. [Harry's holding that wand pretty tightly. He wants answers, damnit.]

[Whether it's from the look, what Harry's saying, or the fact he can't get his wand back, Draco's just going to snap out of sheer frustration] I don't know! I don't know why the hell you're still bothering when nothing's going to change! It doesn't matter what happens here, everything just gets worse there and there's nothing I can do, do you understand?! Nothing is going to change, so I have to accept it and I don't want to!

[Oh hey there, yelling. That caught Harry by surprise a bit, but hey, he can go with it. But after a moment of thinking, he's going to argue back.] Of course everything is going to get worse - it has to before it has a chance of getting better! Maybe nothing that happens here has an effect on what happens back home, but so what? Does that mean we have to accept the way things are back home as how it has to be? Just because you don't think there's anything you can do doesn't mean there isn't.

[And again, after snapping, the anger fizzled out and Draco's just staring at the ice] Why am I talking to you about this, you wouldn't get it. You're Harry Potter, you're used to it.

[Harry frowns at him.] Just because I'm used to it doesn't make it okay.

I didn't say that either, you berk. I'm saying that the things Longbottom told me are nothing compared to everything else you get stuck with and-[He stops abruptly because what the hell Draco is thinking of someone who's not himself.]

This whole thing is bad for everyone, not just me. [Although really kind of staring because Harry is certain words came out of Draco's mouth just now and Harry could've sworn they were sympathetic.]

...do you really want to know? [There's a slight snort and a shake of his head] Heh. Maybe you can knock some sense into me, you already seem to have a good handle of rattling my brain around tonight. [Yes that bump on the back of his head is annoying. And may or may not be trying to move away from the notion that he can be a good person.]

... Yeah, I do. [He hates being left out of the loop, and he is also a masochist.] Er... I'll see what I can do. [But wait, the part about being a good person was awesome. Do that again.]

...Longbottom filled in the missing blanks about what's happening at Hogwarts. You know, the ones you and Granger didn't tell me. Loony told me a few parts, Theo might have as well, but hearing it from Longbottom...if he can actually get his facts straight, maybe that means they're actually true.

... Oh. [Yeah, uh, that's pretty complicated.] Neville isn't really a good liar, so I suspect what he said was probably true.

...Accio wand. [Yeah, forget this. Time to call it a night.]

... [He's still gripping the wand tightly out of reflex to keep from losing it. He doesn't know what to say - there's nothing he can say to make things better, only what he can do back home. Having Draco's wand again reminds him of that too, since the holly wand is still broken back in his timeline. It feels springier and friendlier in his hand than it did back home, and that slight change in the way the wand responds isn't lost on him. Regardless of what that means, it's probably only true here and not back home. Do the changes even matter at all? Will he still be able to do what he has to even if Draco's wand doesn't work quite as well there as it might here? Why is he even thinking about this now, when so much else needs to be dealt with?]

Sorry. [And with that, he opens his hand and lets the magic finally take the wand from him.]

[He almost doesn't catch his wand when it returns to his hand since he wasn't expecting Harry to let go. He's not sure what's going through the brunette's head right now, but his own thoughts are so jumbled he can barely see straight at this point. He gives Harry another blank look, contemplating his options for a long while in silence.

Potter apologized. That's something, isn't it? Maybe. And maybe things at home didn't have to really mingle with things here. Maybe. There were too many maybes and well...Draco's just going to sit on the ice again, keeping his distance.]

The hell are you apologizing for? You're the one who has the save the world.

[Harry is still looking down at his hand and the absence of a wand he doesn't have anymore. Then, he's looking down at the ground and wondering if he's ever going to be done with this, or is everyone else going to have to keep suffering?]

... I haven't done it yet.

No...but you will. We already know how the story's going to end, Potter, we've always known. [Granted, he's not really sure Harry's going to win, but he's pretty convinced they're not going to die at least] Besides...you said you've been destroying the Horcruxes, right? It's a step in the right direction to end it.

[That's... actually really supportive, coming from Draco. Harry feels even worse because there's not much he can offer aside from, "It could be worse." But the wheels are still turning.] Yeah, back at home, we're destroying them. I don't know if back home you're thinking along the same lines, but... if you really think I can do it, you should believe in that. Hogwarts may be horrible now, but there's going to be a day where Voldemort's going to be gone and things are going to be alright again. You just have to work through it.

[Shocking, isn't it? Draco figures hey, the world's already ending so maybe being honest won't be a bad thing.] I couldn't tell you what I'm thinking at home beyond staying alive. But...yeah. I really do think that, it's probably the only thing keeping me sane back there. [Yes contradicting thoughts are starting to come through] I'm just not sure how I feel about the fact that the Carrows are running the school and I'm involved.

[It's not ending, it just sucks balls right now. But they're still alive, and that counts for something!] I wouldn't expect you to. Everyone's trying to stay alive back there. But... if you do remember things when you go back, I think you should hold onto that belief. Even if it's just a little bit of hope, it's worth keeping. [He has noticed that. It's kind of refreshing.] I'm not sure what to think either. It's definitely not a good thing, but I can still think of worse people Voldemort could have put there. Even if it's probably not good for that environment, I think that it's a good thing that you don't like torturing people.

[Well yes, being alive does help! Draco just chews on his lower lip for a moment to think this over.] ...you really think so? Heh, of course you think so. Just...you know, it's one of those things. [Being vague might help pull back the weirdness.] I can think of worse people too, but I still don't like it. And...at least you believe me. Longbottom seems to think I take major joy in terrorizing everyone even though I've no idea what he's talking about. I keep hearing about the future over and over again.

...why am I even telling you this?

[Well, it looks like they're going to be here for a while, so Harry's going to sit back down on the ice. He hopes Neville won't mind the delay too terribly much, but maybe he could make some headway between them if he listens.] I do think so. Hope is important. You're just going to be miserable without it. [Why are you being vague? Harry will want to question vagueness out of habit.] Maybe a couple of years ago I could have thought the same way Neville does, but I honestly don't think you like hurting things. You've changed a lot from the Malfoy that used to mess around with me all the time. I want the others to see that. But the future is one of those things that'll make you miserable if you think about it too much. At least, as long as the future is as crap as ours.

[That is a good question. Harry blinks.] You know, I'm not sure why you're telling me this. Do you trust me?

[Neville better not mind, because Draco's important gdi. Draco's busy prodding at the ice with his wand though, jabbing at it instead of looking at Harry.] Hope. Another thing they teach in Gryffindor charm school, I reckon. [But he knows Harry's got a point. Still...vague is what they teach in Slytherin charm school, after all.] A couple of years ago I would have just left you in the lake to drown. I think it's safe to say a lot has changed from the time we were kids to now. You realize...Hermione's seen it, yes, Luna I don't even know how to tell what the hell she's thinking, and Longbottom...hard-pressed to change, I say. [Stab stab stab the ice.] You realize that not thinking about it is just going to make it worse, don't you? At least I can prepare myself for it.

[...Draco's just going to tilt his head.] That's a bit of a loaded question, isn't it?

[Well yeah. No one is going to argue Draco's importance unless they have a death wish. But Harry is tilting his head, wondering why the hell Draco is stabbing the ice with his wand.] It's something that comes with the territory, actually. If you don't have hope, you're just going to fall flat on your face. [Silly Slytherin charm school. Learn from your Gryffindors! Harry gives a wry chuckle at that. At the time, that's what he thought Draco was doing.] I know. At the same time, I wouldn't have even bothered coming out here to ask you about anything. With Luna, I don't think anyone can ever really know what she's thinking, even if they used Legilimency. With Neville, I think what you've done to him in the past is just going to take a while for him to get over. [Harry shakes his head.] There is such a thing as over-preparing. If you just keep thinking about the future, that's all you're going to think about. It's going to happen eventually, so just meet it when it comes.

[Harry bites his lip.] Yeah, but why else would you be talking to me about this?

[Exactly, and Draco will make sure everyone knows it. Draco's just contenting himself with preoccupation instead of looking Harry in the eye. It's safer this way.] I think I'm a bit tired of falling on my face, thank you. [But Gryffindors are ICKY. Draco just sighs and shakes his head.] Yeah, yeah I know...reap what I sow and all that rot. I probably had this coming to me for years, I just never thought it actually would. What else am I supposed to think about though? I'm just here. I suppose there's Riddle, but that just leads me right back to thinking of the future.

...[A shrug and another defiant stab at the ice] I don't know. Maybe it's just because I think you might possibly understand better than some other people. Or because I love the sound of my own voice, both are a possibility.

[Naturally. Harry's still got no idea why he's preoccupying himself with destriying the ice as something to do.] So hope. [But we do shower! Gryffindors aren't that bad! Harry fidgets again, since he's sort of on both sides of the situation.] At least you get that. I think you should live in the present instead of the past or the future. This might not last, but enjoy what you have while you have it. We're all worried about Riddle, so we should trust in each other to have our backs.

Your voice could definitely be directed at people who aren't me, if it's just a matter of narcissism. The other part, though? I get that.

[Harry Potter and the Action of Wanting to Facepalm but Can't With Two Wands]

[Draco Malfoy and the Action of Screaming at the top of His Lungs]

[Harry Potter and the Action of Suddenly Getting What he Wanted]

[Draco Malfoy and the Action of Thinking FML]

[Harry Potter and the Action of Sympathizing Completely]

[Draco Malfoy and the Action of Starting to Crack]

[Harry Potter and the Action of Wanting to be Supportive]

[Draco Malfoy and the Action of Changing the Subject]

[Harry Potter and the Action of What is the Conversation I Don't Even]

[Draco Malfoy and the Action of Still Insulting People Anyway]

[Harry Potter and the Action of Expecting That, Honestly]

[Draco Malfoy and the Action of Feeling Stupid Right Now]

[Harry Potter and the Action of Contemplating Elder Wand Mastery]

[Draco Malfoy and the Action of Giving In]

[Harry Potter and the Action of Seriously, FML]

[Draco Malfoy and the Action of Revealing Inner-Thoughts]

[Harry Potter and the Action of Feeling Like Hell]

[Draco Malfoy and the Action of Actually Feeling the Same]

[Harry Potter and the Action of Actually Finding Draco's Behavior Confusing]

[Draco Malfoy and the Action of Potentially Trusting Harry]

[Harry Potter and the Action of the Mun Reading that Title as Something Completely Different]

[Draco Malfoy and the Action of the Mun Knowing Exactly What You Thought It Said]

[Harry Potter and the Action of LOL Context]

[Draco Malfoy and the Action of Said Context Never Being Not Funny]

[Harry Potter and the Action of That Statement Being Hilariously True]